Oh, sweet crowbar.

Ah, sweet crowbar, you mean so much to me.
Multitudes of boxes have been smashed to give up thier items to me; through you.
I have slain countless headcrabs and barnacles just because you were so damn useful.

Toor-alur-alai.

The shotgun, the shotgun, what times we've had together.
Father Grigori gave you to me, and what a present it was!
With the one-shot, I kill normal zombies; the double-shot for the fast, bastards.

Grav-gun, you are mine. From picking up flammable canisters to buzzsaws, we have obliterated combine, zombies and countless other foes.
From solving physics puzzles to blasting away hacks, we have prevailed.

And so it was. I am Anticitizen One.